Not yet…
Two little words. Deceptively soft, bordering on innocuous. But these two words can exert the power of two hundred tons to derail our progress, or worse, stop us in our tracks. How many times have we been told: “Not yet…” How many times have we told ourselves: “Not yet…” You just have to……first. After this, you can….
How often are WE the “Not Yet”?
Behind professional obligations, home obligations, relationship obligations, care obligations, until we risk falling off or have already fallen off the priority list, entirely. Our. Own. List. Or, we cannot make room for ourselves, if we can even get on the list. You might be wondering: what does this have to do with our finances, Jennifer? If you guessed: EVERYTHING! give yourself a gold star, but don’t stop reading. Telling ourselves “Not Yet” keeps us in a perpetual state of reaction. Constant uncertainty. It is a place riddled with fear, inertia, feelings of inadequacy and exhaustion. I have heard psychologists suggest that procrastination, in the form of “Not Yet” can be a form of self-protection. I can see that, to a point. However, left unchecked, it can quickly snowball, leading to worse outcomes. This can be especially devastating in financial matters. What do I mean? Let’s get into some common “Not Yet” we hear from others, or from ourselves.
How do I know? I have been told “Not Yet” in every single above example. Sometimes, it was someone else telling me, but more often than not, I said it to myself. “Not Yet,” meaning: I’m scared, I don’t understand, I don’t deserve. Oh boy, that last one. That one is a doozy. But, what I have learned from my approaching fifty years of living: If I expended half the energy on action, that I expended on the mental gymnastics of “Not Yet” I would not be required to spend so much energy and resources on reaction. And reaction ALWAYS costs more. Always. In time. In talent. In finances.
We have to find a way to move from a stressed state of reaction to a forward state of action. I cannot help but think of the powerful words of Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, who said: “Action has magic, grace, and power in it.” I believe he is spot on! What I would add to his words: progress over perfection. In our increasingly zero-sum world, we are lead to believe if we are not, or cannot quickly be, “perfect,” there is no point in trying, and we don’t even begin. As one of my friends recently shared from The Running Bible: “Run when you can. Walk if you have to. Crawl if you must. Just don’t give up.”
But, how? How might we move to a forward state of action? For that, I lean on the one word my beloved cousin uttered to me, as I related to her my own “Not Yet” in which I was stuck. She said: “Commit. You just need to commit. And then, don’t look back.” I stopped short. I cried. And then, I went back to my annual planner, the first page, where it asked me to choose my word to inspire and guide my actions this year, and I crossed out what I had written, because she was right. She is right. I wrote: COMMIT. In red ink. All Caps.
So what, its already February. Commit. Change can and does happen at any time! We can make it so. Right now. Today. Open the savings account, and set up new direct deposits: 1 for emergencies and 1 for the treat you really want. Call H/R and get the form you need to enroll in the retirement plan, then complete it and turn it in, even if you start with 1% contributions. Polish up that resume, and throw your hat deep in the ring for that promotion or new job. I propose we turn “Not Yet” on its head, and bend it to our will. I propose we use “Not Yet” to motivate us, instead of derailing us. Is it all going as I hoped? Not Yet. But I am committed and working on it, I can see where I want to go, and I am not giving up…Not Yet.
